May 28, 2010

Living throughout the years I could not help but collect things. If I lived in a house I probably would have collected more useless things as I did living in an apartment.

When my Mother passed away in 1977 in Budapest I inherited the task of cleaning out the apartment. Getting rid if furniture, art and clothing was not as difficult as getting rid of personal mementos.

Even though the war interfered with our lives, still there were photographs and other personal memorabilia from my parents', grandparents' and my life.

My mother saved stuff from my childhood and from my school years. There were assignment books, school documents, letters and a million and one other items I had to sift through and decide what to throw out and what to save.

It was not an easy task. I would have liked to save everything but naturally it was impossible. Therefore, I saved a lot of photographs and a few odds and ends that are here with me. The rest of the memories are in my heart.

That is the problem we immigrants face. Our past is in our mind and heart. Everything that happened before coming to this country is just memories.

And for that I envy the ones born here. As big as this country is they still have their childhood friends, their families and their relatives.

I am not implying that we lived like transplanted orphans. We also have some friends and a few relatives but it is not the same.

Nothing can substitute for ones home.

I am not homesick by any means. I have no clue how my life would have turned out had I stayed in Hungary. Actually, I am pretty sure it would have not turned out as well as it did here in the US.

And I am also pretty sure that none of my friends could or would have succeeded as they did had they stayed there.

Now back to collecting things. As I said earlier I hate to throw out anything but sometimes I must.

But I do have an old 35mm camera that is totally non-automatic with a hand held light meter. And amazingly they both are in good working condition.

I also have a super8 movie projector that I am afraid to use because if anything happens to it it can not be fixed. I also have about one million feet of super8 film that I can not view for obvious reasons.

I have a few 35mm cameras, some for underwater photography, that I am not using since I have a digital camera and using that is easier than anything.

I also have a few old wind-up wrist watches (some of them still work) simply because I love to wind them up every day.

The way I see it there is nothing wrong with being old fashioned and sticking to old things as long as one also accepts the advantages of the modern age.

Let's be realistic, my car does have automatic transmission, I have GPS and climate control, too. And, don't forget the moon roof!

How much more modern one can get?